Alarm Clocks

I have been home for four weeks now. We arrived home from our road trip on Monday, May 24th.

Since then on Saturday, Sunday, and Monday mornings an unknown and mysterious alarm clock goes off at what I'm assuming is set for 7:00 a.m.

I always wake up with a staggering jolt to the shrieking bells of this alarm clock.

I have searched and searched my room tearing apart through my desk and closet, even my clothes drawers and book boxes hoping to find that greedy little sleep stealer.

To no avail.

So my precious weekends and the beginning of every week starts off with a rude awakening.

But the worst part is the inconsistency. One sunday I awoke at around 9:45 a.m. positive that I had heard no alarm almost three hours earlier.

On one occasion I set my phone alarm for 6:55 a.m. on a Monday and waited.

I sat there ticking away the moments, waiting for that alarm to go off so I could hear where it was coming from.

Usually it startles me awake and by the time I am conscious enough to look for it, it has already silenced itself and the search is futile.

But not this time. I was going to hear the little annoying machine, find it, and rip out its batteries one by one.

6:58 a.m.

6:59 a.m. (oh my gosh, is that a spider? Look away! Look away!)

7:00 a.m.

I sit and wait, in tense silence, any second now it will beep, and give its position away!

7:00 a.m. and 30 seconds.

7:01 a.m.

OH COME ON!

It chose to not reveal itself to me. To randomly, on a day where it has always beeped, not beep!

I sit in an angry silence for a while, hoping that maybe the time was just off by a few minutes.

No such luck.

at 7:12 a.m. I put my head back down on my pillow and close my eyes. Falling into a deep sleep filled with hammers and tiny shattered alarm clock pieces.

SHRIIIIIEEEEP. SHHRRIIIIIIIEEEEEP. SHRIEEEEEPPP.

I open my eyes groggily.

SHRIIIIIEEEEP. SHHRRIIIIIIIEEEEEP. SHRIEEEEEPPP.

My heart is trying to inform me of what my brain already knows.

SHRIIIIIEEEEP. SHHRRIIIIIIIEEEEEP. SHRIEEEEEPPP.

It's an attack. The alarm clock is going off now, I need to wake and search for it quickly!

SHRIIIIIEEEEP. SHHRRIIIIIIIEEEEEP. SHRIEEEEEPPP

I throw off my covers and pounce out of bed, inducing a major head rush, and dizzy spots floating in front of my eyes.

Silence.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

I missed it. My chance. My opportunity.

I fall backwards onto my bed holding my now calming head and cursing that alarm clocks existence.

I don't even mind being awake early.

But if I HEAR that Stupid alarm clock ONE MORE TIME I swear I will BURN THIS ROOM TO THE GROUND!